Who are we..and WHY??

For those that have followed us for awhile, you will note the new mast head with the Superfamily Coat of Arms/Crest in the corner.  His Highness and I worked diligently about every detail of the crest.  We decided on every color, every picture, every word, each symbol…everything.  What you see is a finished product of a lot of prayer, compromise and creativity..which in essence is what the Superfamily is about.  I am publishing this to give you a glimpse into what the crest is about and cause you to think of what your family represents.  More importantly, I want this be available to those in our family that come after us as a testament of what our ‘walk” should look like. 

To the 13 and beyond…now hear this and tell your children and those you choose to marry-we are NOT common, ordinary, run of mill people.  We are not like everyone else. Everywhere we go our presence dominates a room, not just because there’s a lot of us…but because there is a light that goes before us.  It’s in our laughter, our gestures, they way we look out for each other. Understand, you are not “better” than others per se’…you are simply anointed. Individually, we are unique and valuable; BUT together we are a dominating mighty force of wisdom, creativity, insight and prosperity.  Never take that for granted.

Now to the crest...The Superman “S” of course stands for our new "family" name.  When we combined in 2007, we were no longer just the Stephens, Jamerson’s or Anderson’s.  No one name encompassed everything and everybody fairly, so I asked God for a new name.  Along with our “super” size, it takes supernatural favor, wisdom, insight, and patience in order to manage and be a part of our family. I also felt I needed a cape in order to keep up with all of the demands that were dropped on us running a conglomerate called “family”.  So Superfamily…definitely fits.  We’ve got people that want to “apply” to be in our family, because of what they see on the surface.  However, we can tell you…it’s not for everyone.  There is an empowerment necessary to blend as a family successfully…we’ve been at it for years and aren’t “there” yet.

So let that be encouragement to those of you that are in complex families.  1.  Don’t allow anyone to tell you how long it should take to blend.  Noone knows- period.  Every family dynamic is different and blending successfully looks different depending on your point of reference.  2.  Also, look at your family characteristics, your talents, abilities and things that both families do well or your “opposites”…somewhere in there you may find the purpose for why God brought you together. 3. Look for ways to unite the family. It could be a crest, a picture, a tradition or a moniker that everyone knows. Where there is unity, there is strength.

Stay tuned  for what the colors stand for…and the #13!

Authentic Assessment of EPIC FAILS

During this time of reflection we get caught up in the laundry list of everything that was absolutely wonderful about the year…eh..nice, feel goodish..cool for a "swell your chest up" look what I did moment, but without balance its' ineffective at real personal growth. 2012 is a year of divine order so pat yourself on the back if you must, but balance it with truth about what really didn’t go well, so you can be ready.

Me? I have had MAJOR EPIC FAILS this year.  Things, projects, people that I wasted time energy and resources on that should have been handled differently.  Other things that I should have devoted more time to that I threw by the wayside. I could have done more, way more.  For instance…..

I did a theater production this year..it was almost a 2 month run, it was good! But there were many auditions I turned down, and I shouldn’t have. I turned down teaching a girls group class because I thought I should be doing something else.  I shouldn’t have-FAIL. (Lesson: things that I enjoy and can do now that my children are older, should not be sacrificed out of fear, guilt for people that don’t notice or things that don’t matter..My God given gifts will no longer be unemployed)

 This year I had to admit that a project that I gave much energy into has yielded very poor results and I kept pouring more energy into it-FAIL (Lesson: Make honest assessments earlier in the game.  When something reveals itself as a dead end..you should believe it.  There are other doors, and God’s promise is that he will open up a window.  Look for opportunities everywhere and outside of the box that others put you in.  Quit wasting time spinning in circles with intimidation-look for confidence and sow into it.)

Yes, I took my daughter to Chicago and to see Wicked as promised….but what about all the weekend trips to the mall, movies and lunch at our favorite place that have been canceled..not so good. Or her last band performance of the year that I missed to race across town to help someone who really didn’t need my help after all. EPIC FAIL-ooooThis one still burns me up...I digress (Lesson: Family first period.  This was me and my husband’s consistent confession since 2007 and we’re going back to it.  Everything and everyone else, simply secondary.)

Nope, this isn’t as fun as ooo I got a new car or a new job this year! But whatever.. my car is good..but it won’t get me to the next level.  Its only by being honest with me, God and everyone around me that I can truly grow.  I can do this all night…gotta a list of about 16 so far.   I care enough about my kingdom assignments (ministry, books, teaching, training), my husband, my kids and my friends to do this so I can be a better ME. Take time this weekend and make a true assessment. Ask your friends…no, not the ego strokers- I mean the straight up ones that know you, that you trust and that trust you..that will say frankly..”you suck at this, this and this and you need to do better. Listen, really listen, pray and work on a strategy to change.  Let’s put 2012 in divine order starting with YOU.

Strategy...plan....list ...HOW??  Stay tuned for the Superfamily's final blog post of the year on tomorrow along with an exciting announcement!!

Tribulation worketh patience…and both are annoying

The Superfamily is finally back into our house, but it’s still far from being our home. We still have boxes everywhere! We are going through the process of going through each box to determine what goes and what stays. I view this as a fresh start, a new beginning…a chance to rid ourselves of the old and look forward to the new. Ideally, this would be a good exceptthe process is painstaking. If this was just my home, over 80% of these boxes would not have made it back in the door from the restoration people. Why? If you haven’t seen it, worn it or use it in 2 years you don’t need it, chances are you are merely accumulating it with the fear that no more is coming. Fear is a horrible, inconsistent motivator. I've seen for years what the poverty mentality does to people and it’s sad. Remember, It doesn’t matter whether you have “money” or not, the mentality of being poor is worse than actually being poor. Message to others:  Learn to let things...GO.


That’s a difficult principle to teach especially in a blended family. Every piece of paper, all 4,954 photos, every other stitch of clothing reminds someone on one side or the other of what their life USED to be. In order for us to get to where I believe God is calling us, that can no longer be the focus or driving force behind every decision. A memory maybe…the focus…no. Whereas I have worked hard over the years to get to the place that the most important memories I have aren’t captured in a book or something material…they are captured in my heart and in my spirit…I learn daily that everyone hasn’t gotten there yet nor do they view it at the same level of importance.

So in the interim, I live in clutter and there MUST be extra grace being applied from God for me to deal with it, because people that know me “for real for real” know that this stuff (mine, his, hers, there's EVERYBODY's) would have been on the curb weeks ago and my house would have been cleaned, organized and decorated for Thanksgiving. What is this teaching me…patience? Well, Tribulation worketh patience…and BOTH are annoying. But I will need patience to become the multipreneur that I am working to be. I will need patience to edit my 2nd and 3rd book simultaneously. I will need patience to work on this TV pilot project. I will need patience to continue to go to work everyday and seek out new and  different things to learn. I will need patience to sow wisdom into my lil’ heirs. I will need patience with myself to forgive me when I screw up and when I don’t have enough patience with others. There is hope...in the very next verse that I reference above..patience brings experience (or character) and experience reaps hope! Character and hope are excellent fruit of learning how to wait...so I believe I'll just teach by example, sit still and wait right here....bouncing my leg up & down and tapping my fingers feverishly :).

Its' all gotta go....

As most of you know (if you follow me on FB or Twitter)The Superfamily just recent had a fire in our home. No one was hurt and nothing of any real value was damaged (no major structural damage etc..). However, even after the fire dept aired the house out with “superfan”, the house still smelled of burned plastic and smoke. Although the fire was contained to the basement, its effects permeated to every lower level bedroom as well as up to my bedroom on the main floor to the kitchen, living room, dining room and bathroom. In short, the whole house was contaminated because of a small fire in a contained location.

The insurance company has set us in a several hotel suites and the family is doing ok, terribly inconvenienced but ok. But the house is another story. The professional restoration people has practically wiped my home out. They have taken everything from the pictures that were on the wall to every VCR tape we had in the house. All the furniture, tables, chairs, beds, dressers, clothes, shoes, washer, dryer, pots, pans, vases…EVERYTHING was packed in a box to be cleaned offsite and brought back after renovation.

I had a tough time with this. It seemed a bit overboard and it was inconveniencing me even further. I had to go buy pans & pots to cook with at the hotel for goodness sake. It seemed to me that as long as the basement was cleaned, the rest of the house should be fine. But the professionals knew better. They knew that after the reconstruction, the painting, the cleaning of carpet, washing on walls and every crevice of the basement was not enough to ensure that my home would smell appropriately and not continue to push smut though the air from one room to the next…. They HAD to take out everything that was touched by smoke, take it away and clean it. In so many words they told me, its all gotta go. At one point I went and sat in my living room and cried. I spent four years designing the walls and finding the perfect B & W photos, finally picking out furniture and making a pretty big house a warm home. To see it all in shambles, dirty, smelly and boxed away was overwhelming. To know my family had to scramble to find a few day’s worth of clothes and my husband lost rest and time having to handle the business of this was more than I could take. Angry wasn’t the word. I should be studying for a play, finishing my book and helping to plan a wedding, not hauling clothes and food in my car to 4 different hotel rooms. However, the professionals also told me that when they return the items, they will look like new and the smell of smoke will not be on them anywhere. Hmmm...that's an upside...

Somebody out there has some things in their heart that were ruined by poor relationships, a torrid past or bad decision making. My advice to you…its all gotta go. Give it all to God and allow him to make it all brand new. You will be inconvenienced for awhile, but when He begins to restore you to your rightful place…you will be like new again. So sit in the living room and cry, like I did if you must…but please know DON’T’ keep the damage hidden from the Lord. Expose your hurts, your disappointments and your desires to Him and let him restore to you the joy of your salvation. But first…its all gotta go.