Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Monkey in the Middle

Wow...found this blog entry from 9/6/07 and I will be doggone if this same thing isn't happening today too...uh huh..I see a pattern here, devil!!

Monkey in the middle was an interesting chiild's game that we used to play. It's now a board game...but back in the day...it used to be that people on two opposite sides threw a ball back and forth between them and you "the monkey" would try to catch it by intercepting it. Unfortunately, you end up running back and forth between people constantly. You jump up only to find that they threw it low that time...you dip only to see it fly overhead. By 20 or so passes you are tired and you want the ball...but after awhile you don't care...it doesn't seem worth it.

Today, I am the "Monkey". I am running in between issues, people and problems trying to make and keep everyone happy...while I "make do". I make do with feeling neglected, I make do with feeling misunderstood, I make do with not having what I need. I try not to complain, cause in some areas (but not all)...I have more than I have ever had. But the running, the missing, the jumping, the dipping...has worn me out. I want to scream to the world...I'm not perfect...I can't hold your weight and mine too...BACK OFF. However, in the midst of it all..I have remembered to take of me. That's right...no over eating...no eating a ton of junk...no drowning my sorrows in food or shopping. I am valuable even and though I feel like crud...feelings are an unstable source of information. I am not perfect, but I am loved...by ME.

TODAY 9/22/09:
The enemy thinks he's slick..I will not be fooled another year, I betcha that!

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