Thursday, September 30, 2010

The UN-you


When you see this error message pop up in either e-mail correspondence or when trying to log onto a system...it usually means something you did prior to this step causes the computer to question whether you are a "real person" or not. The system will then require you to put in a code or password to prove that you are not a machine...or spam.
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Everyone once in awhile you need to do a inner system check to see if you are a "real person" or not. Seriously. When people see you...what do they see...the nice you, the polite you, the ameniable you...? Have you been playing the role of "you" for so long that the mask is glued to your face and you don't know the real "you" anymore. You have forgotten what you like, what you dreamed, what you have been designed to do, what you dislike, what you really feel... Its been a whirlwind...years.. months...days.. that you have spent faking a smile, faking a acquaintence, faking a lifestyle, faking a level of committment. You are so used to lying you know longer notice that you eat pickles, just because "the cool" kids did and you wanted to look cool. You pay no attention to the fact that when you get dressed 50 people run through you mind that you want to impress with your new suit or handbag. You only go to that church because your greatgrandad help build the cornerstone. You go along to get along..Fake.
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You have become a shell of who you are supposed to be and if you don't delve deep soon, understand the code and authenticate yourself...you wont be able to go any further. What does this have to do with blended families and 2nd marriages...TONS! With all the sticky and intricate dynamics of a stepfamily you walk on eggshells and tow fine lines hourly. You are constantly being careful not offend or cross sacred lines, sensitivities or boundaries. So you adjust, you change, you flip, you flop, you hold this back...you become the Un-you. Fake.
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You don't want to be compared or viewed anything like the ex-her or the ex-him-nothing wrong with that, uh NOBODY does or should....But the other extreme is that you will go out of your way to be nothing like anyone else your spouse has ever been with. That too is fake.
Enough to drive a person crazy! What's the remedy?
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Cling to your faith in Chirst and keep your conscience clear, for some people have deliberately violated their conscience and as a result their faith has been shipwrecked 1st Timothy 1:19. NLT
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KEEPING YOUR CONSCIENCE CLEAR has a direct effect of your faith. Daily...hourly if you have to...ask yourself one of the deepest questions in the world...WHY? Why am I doing this, why am I saying this, why am I going here, why am I speaking to her, why am I ignoring them, why dont I feel comfortable... You may lie to others, but tell yourself the truth. Relearn you and become genuine, authentic...real. Its time to un-do the un-you.

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