Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Marriage retreat con't...Image Matters and more

Thanks for the feedback so far...there are two more installations.. Here is 2 of 3! Dr. James and Stacia Pierce shared lifechanging information with us at the Marriage Works retreat and we are in turn sharing it with you. They too are a stepfamily and as such, we could learn MUCH from themas to what works and what does not work in a Christian Stepfamily situation. They taught about protecting the marriage with its image, the vision, and the relationships you nurture or weed away. Enjoy and pass it along.

5. Wives you are primarily responsible for the family’s image. IMAGE MATTERS ! Appropriate image brings favor and blessings. Be mindful of how your children and spouse go out of the house. Be mindful of YOUR public appearance. Your husband should never ever look over at you and hesitate to claim you. The family reputation rests partially in how you handle and display them. Know and implement simple manners and study to be a lady and not just a woman. Are you a blessing and a crown to your husband or an embarrassment and a tattered baseball cap? Are you loud, obnoxious, immature, profane, silly, lazy, unkempt, and disorganized and a total liability rather an asset? What are you bringing to the table that a babysitter, secretary, cook or prostitute couldn’t do? Yeah, I said it-We have to be deeper than that! When people think of your family what image pops into their heads? Do you even have a “brand”, something that you are known for…or stand for?

6. Your house should be your dream center. Declutter it and make it a place where dreams can be birthed. Get a library of books and tapes that can teach and train you and your children to think on a higher level. Develop vision boards for your dreams and teach your children to do the same. Motivating things should adorn the walls and the vision of you and your spouse for your family should be accessible and reachable.

7. Get away with your spouse as often as possible. Spending intimate, peaceful time alone is essential to nurturing oneness. Getaways can be as expensive as a vacation or as inexpensive as a day at the museum. Date nights are important as well. Try to do that weekly in some form. Connect for a least 10-15 minutes a day to download your day and share priorities.

8. Disconnect from previous spouses or previous girlfriends/boyfriends family. Develop new traditions together with your new spouse. These people are no longer a part of your new life. You are no longer obligated to them or their traditions. Be cordial, polite and a witness- but not obligated. Allow and encourage the children to participate in their family outings, but your presence is not required and you should be clear that your new spouse and his/her family is your new priority. You are now obligated and in covenant with a new family and new in-laws. Get to know and love them. Unnecessary stress and drama can occur when you try to maintain and juggle relationships no longer on your destiny path. Also, be wary of social media reconnections with past boy/girl friends. It’s not worth the toehold and the door that the enemy can pry open in your marriage. Develop new friends together. Also, find drama free peaceful couples to glean from and spend time with.

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