I am rereading a book called The Influencer. This book starts by explaining that we have the tendency to prepare for the worst or spend alot of time learning "how to cope" that we spend very little time dealing with prevention. We feel powerless to change our plight, our situation, our relationships, our outcomes, so we read books on how to DEAL with teachers...or how to DEAL with diabetes...or How to DEAL with a bad marriage How to DEAL with having a bad attitude etc...I'm sick of "dealing"...coping...its time for influencing change.
The example the book gave was phenomenal and I also shared this with my "mentees". Lets say that there was this extremely steep mountainside and every car that comes across that area falls over the mountain crashing into the valley below. A community organizer sees the carnage of tangled metal and corspes and springs into action. They are so frustrated that noone was "doing anything". So they quickly raise money, jump on the phone for help, makes a website, gathers the best and brightest ambulances, EMT's and trauma medical staff people and he and all his resources go into the valley to wait for the next person in the car to come over the cliff, and the next person, and the next person, and the next person to come over the mountain and then they can deal with the injuries of any survivors.
WHAT ? Yeah...don't laugh...they are just like you and I. They have effectively learned how to cope with the accidents. They have also filled their need to "do something". But of course it makes more sense to go to the mountain where the issue is and build a gate to prevent the accident in the first place?
There are somethings in our lives that are preventable. Period. You eat and feed your kids an ongoing diet of junk food, salt and sweets they are not going to be healthy thriving kids. You have unprotected sex with someone with HIV, you will probably get it to. You smoke packs of cigarettes a week, your chances for Cancer have increased. You don't exercise regularly or eat a balanced diet-you will probably be weak and fat. Those, we understand.
On a more personal note, there are things in your life that you see over and over in your attitude, your demeanor, your reactions, your responses, your actions, your dress, your vocabulary that you have learned how to "cope" with instead of working to change. You have learned how to pretend, how to manage and how to perpetrate being who people think you should be. But standing in that valley isn't changing the issues in your life. You will just keep watching the cars come tumbling down. Only climbing to the top of the mountain and doing what's necessary to prevent the disaster will bring about the change and growth you need to go to the next level in your life.
How you say...read the Personal Board of Directors post. Also, recognizing when you need help and being honest about it. Humble yourself and ask significant others in your life to help you. Teachers don't come looking for students. Students seek out teachers. Study, study and study. Exposure and information changes the seasons of your life. Actively pursue, confess and put change into action..one thing at a time. ex. This week I will NOT eat or feed my family junk, Or (if youhave problem with negativity) try... this week, I will say one thing positive to at least 5 different people every day...etc.. baby steps...small steps...will eventually get you out of your valley experience and get you to the mountain top where you can really see further, clearer and achieve all that you need to accomplish.