By the power of GRAYSKULL...I have NO POWER??

We lost power on the 5th of July….it was just restored last evening. During the time the power was out, it reached over 100 degrees so we stayed in a hotel a few days..just making the best of an uncomfortable situation. I went back to the house a few times during the outage, and it was eerie. The dead quietness was deafening. No TV’s, no radios, no computers, no dishwasher humming, no dryer tumbling, no iron steaming…nothing. The house didn’t even feel…well for lack of a better word…"alive".

You could quickly tell the difference between the houses in our area that had power and those that didn’t. Those that did, were happening….animated…active..those like ours…were dark and dead. There was a house or two running on minimal power with a generator, but not for long. They soon joined the ranks at a nearby hotel until the power was restored.

When that power came back to our house...you would have thought we could take over the world..if we had a mountain, we would have yelled just like HE-Man...By the power of Grayskull...I HAVE THE POWER!!!  Why, because when you are empowered..you can DO things. Flat Irons started heating, music started playing, washing machine started swishing.. And just like He-man (who had the authority after getting power to change his pet into a roaring Lion) you can also then empower OTHERS.

Three valuable things I learned:

1. You quickly can tell the difference between those that operate in power and those that don’t. People whose dreams, ambitions and purpose have been back-burnered, sidelined or trampled on, live without any light in their eyes. You’ve seen them. They have no hum of activity or growth, just doing the day in, day out. As the kids would say “get yo’ life”. Translate: Things are in disarray, out of order, out of balance and messy in your life. Fix it.

2. You can only run on a generator for so long. THIS is where most of us are. We are operating at minimal power from a temporary source. From us on the outside, our neighbors’ light in the window looked like a beacon of hope. But on the inside of their house, things were still out of whack. Most appliances were unplugged, they all slept in the living room with one fan and everything was shoved into a smaller frig to conserve energy. You can only run like this for so long. You can only fool everyone, and yourself for a short amount of time. Eventually you need let go of the temporary and seek the permanent.

3. The power was available all along…WE just weren’t connected to it. It was evident when the power company did the testing, fuses were blowing and sparks were flying. All of which was an indication that the source of power was where it was supposed to be…there was nothing wrong with it, there was something wrong with the connection. The power and favor of God is available to us that ascribe to living a godly life. He says that there is no good thing that he will withhold to those that walk uprightly. Get connected, not to the temporary, fleeting or flawed…get connected to HIM.

If Eve had watched Independence Day…we may not be in this mess…

In my first book "A Princess Cut Diamond", I shared a truth that still rings in my head today.  The devil is not trying to make you uncomfortable…he is trying to KILL you...blow you, and your family off the map.  Eve thought the enemy was her friend…that he was just trying to show her who she could become if she bent the directives of God.  Eve fell for it, why?  Because she didn’t know the undergirding strategy of the devil and he didn’t tell her.

Had Eve watched Independence Day (yeah the one with Bill Pullman and Will Smith), she may had had a clue.

When the aliens’ arrive on planet earth, of course there is panic and gunfire.  At this point fear is ruling on both sides. When the dust settles…The people of earth, (America in particular being the “sweethearts” that we are) want to believe the best about the alien race.  We want to learn about them, learn from them, hang out with them..making the stupid, naïve assumption that they came in peace. In the course of the initial fight, one of the aliens is knocked out cold and captured.

President Whitmore goes to see the captured alien and that’s where the grits hit the fan… This is the scene where the movie takes a hard left. It’s the moment when true intentions are revealed.  The President asks the aliens do they come in peace..it responds “no peace”.  President Whitmore goes on to talk about what we can learn from each other blah blah blah..the alien is not having it.  Finally, the President  asks, “what do you want us to do?”  The alien responds…DIE, DIE.  Needless to say, that alien never makes it out of the lab alive. The President now knows that the goal is annihilation of mankind. Peace isn’t an option…he tells the armed forces “Nuke em’.  When people show you their true intentions...or when you finally figure out that someone is all about them, or that this relationship is toxic, or this habit is debilitating..you need to make a presidential kinda decision. Get your armed forces (the Word of God) and make a command on the promises of God. When you truly know what is on the line; your stance needs to change from passive to aggressive and defensive.

Living a passive lifestyle, waiting on the enemy to hit you is silly and it will destroy your home...while you playin'. Be on the defense with prayer, exercise, confession, sowing time into your family, eating healthy, correction, being fiscally responsible, work life balance…areas where the enemy would love to rip you a part and give you the impression that if you bend the directives of God, you can have it all.  Let today truly be your Independence Day from everything or everyone that is sucking the life out of you, but putting nothing back.  Declare your Independence from immature behaviors, irresponsibility, and lack of vision.  Declare it LOUD in the words of President Whitmore...

 Perhaps it's fate that today is the Fourth of July, and "I "will once again be fighting for "my" freedom... Not from tyranny, oppression, or persecution... but from annihilation. "I" am fighting for "my" right to live [an abundant life]. To exist. And SINCE "I"  will win today, the Fourth of July will no longer be known as an American holiday, but as the day "this family" declared in one voice: "We will not go quietly into the night!" We will not vanish without a fight! We're going to live on! We're going to survive! Today we celebrate our Independence Day! 

Don’t get it twisted…ever. As far as the enemy is concerned… No peace…lets NUKE EM’...

Who asks questions like THAT??

Almost six years ago in Dunkin Donuts parking lot with a beautiful Princess Cut Diamond and White Gold Ring, His Highness asked me a hard question….”Will you Marry Me”…??  It’s obvious I said yes, and after knowing him almost 10 years..this week marks our 5^th Anniversary.  Hard and or sensitive questions are status quo for us now.  It’s a part of who we are as a couple, why?  Because we care enough to cause a little hurt in feelings, for a greater healing in spirit.

So this year’s hard question from me to him was…..

“What about this marriage so far has disappointed you?”

Who asks questions like that?  ME that’s who.  Why?  Because more than I want to have the silly immature illusion that I am a perfect, seamless, wonderful, amazing, faultless, virtuous wife…I want to always operate in truth, even if the truth sucks. 

The bible says that houses and wealth you get from your folks…but a prudent wife is from the Lord.

I love the very first part of the definition of prudent…“having good sense”.  A wife with good sense can asks the hard questions knowing that an atmosphere of phoniness is the breeding ground for failure. I know it’s hard to believe people…but “everything ain’t been wonderful”.  You have to know and operate in truth so that you can do what is necessary in your character to build an environment in your marriage conducive for your spouse to grow and be nurtured in.  

Its sad to see marriages that look “wonderful” on the outside, but when you peel back some layers..wives are afraid of damaging their spouses esteem so they won’t tell him that their temperament, ego or pride is causing a great divide in the house.  Husbands won’t tell their wives, afraid of offending them, that it embarrasses him when she isn’t dressed appropriately or acts loud and brash in public. It isn’t easy, but I will always ask the hard questions and make sure that I keep my ego and pride in check so when my husband has to ask me a hard question, there is grace available to think, not be offended or worry to cause offense and to answer in truth.

Marriages and families (blended or otherwise) cannot grow effectively without having these crucial conversations. If you haven’t had a conversation like this and you have been married over a year..you have some catching up to do.  Don’t let your marriage go on for 7, 10, 20 years without knowing what the little foxes are that have the potential to spoil your vine. Care enough…love enough.. to ask the hard questions.

Shut up and while you're at it- don't hit anyone in the neck with a bat!

“Son, Never miss an opportunity to Shut Up”….-JR Ewing, Dallas..

That is a classic line if I ever heard one.

Just Perfect! I was all set to write a post on instructing others on the biblical principal …Studying to be quiet. I brought up the word document to begin to type and then I get a phone call..and guess what I had to do. SHUT UP. No, I don’t mean simmer down, choose my words carefully or speak sparingly. I mean I had to SHUT UP and fast. Had I not, it would have been some smoke in the city and I would probably have spoken out of disappointment and anger and not have been reasonable. I am so glad that God authenticated the gravity of his Word just that quickly. It further confirms that I continue to share out of experience and NOT from what I heard or that I am mimicking from others.

What does this have to do with step families?? Nothing in this case, but EVERYTHING in general. I've said it before, people have a misconception that everyone gets thrown into a blender, you hit a button and out comes this wonderful blended family smoothie. Uh No. That’s not everyone’s story. More often than not, people although they love each other to a degree, are vying for attention, pushing to be the priority, to feel important, to make sure nothing is being “taken” from them…sometimes at the expense or disregard of others. With all that drama going on….sometimes (not all the time) its best to not miss the opportunity to shut up....pray, stand still and see the salvation of the Lord.  Don't get off center...and don't hit anyone in the neck with a bat (whatever, THAT's just good advice).

I Thessalonians 4:11 scripture says in the Message Bible “to make it your ambition to lead a quiet life: You should mind your own business and work with your hands.. Grandma said it all the time”baby...mind your own self business..”

I am so glad Dallas is back on..*I see you laughing, skip yall* laugh if you want to..but I learn something everytime I see it. Something about it..just makes me look for the layers..for the lesson…for the revelation and this past week..it was simple..in the words of the Rock..Know your role…and shut your mouth. Shhhhhhhh.




*pic courtesy of TNT