Get The Rebound...

The 1989-1990 Detroit Pistons was my most favored sports team of all time. Partly because there were no “stars”. Noone really shined more than anyone else…it was The Detroit Pistons against Larry Byrd and the Celtics, or Magic Johnson and the Lakers…they Pistons were always billed as a team (much like the Superfamily :). The reason I believe that their back to back championship seasons were so successful was due to wisdom of their coach Chuck Daly who put every Pistons in the right role for the right time.

Just recently NBA retired Dennis Rodman was in back in Detroit to retire his jersey number 10. Dennis was a rebound rustler. His job was to get the rebound…Dennis rarely drove the ball down court, or took three point shots. Again, His job was to get the rebound. He was named Defensive Player of year and helped the Pistons get two championship rings by doing what he was designed to do and staying in his lane. Other Pistons may have gotten better stats in points or free throws but that “1” in the win column would not have happened had it not been for Dennis’ role. He was designed to play defense. His job was to get the rebound.

In Stepfamilies, the lines of roles and responsibilities can get blurry. You get a lot of unsolicited, although perhaps well-meaning advice from people who have no clue as to the intricacies of the dynamics you face on a day to day basis. Trying to navigate what others think, and what your role actually is in every separate new relationship in the family is draining, demanding and emotionally strenuous. You cross a line here and get slapped back. You don’t do “enough” here and get criticized behind your back. Its enough to make you want to retreat and mind your own self-business (as grandma would say). I know, because I’ve done it and its an emergency tactic to have to get refocused and hear clearly from God.

Like Dennis, You need to hear from the "coach" to know what you are supposed to do. You may think its shooting, blocking, or dribbling..but you could just be assigned to getting the “rebounds”. ..just picking up pieces…here and there..getting in where you fit in.. Its not as glamorous, but your family will not get one in the win column without your skill set and tenacity. They may not even respect it, but eventually…even if it years later…”your jersey” will rise to the rafters and many will rise and call you blessed.  Be diligent about learning your role and then stay in that lane.  THAT is the only place where there is grace to prosper.  If you veer or get into the roles that others should be doing, you will be operating on your own..and alone is NO place to be if you are running a Superfamily.

I didn't get the job

I didn't get the job I interviewed for...it was better pay, more work, more responsibility and hours, and did I mention better pay...but I didn't get it. So, why am I still smiling?? That's a darn good question. On the surface I have nothing to smile about...I mean I still have a job and I'm grateful. But this was an opportunity I wanted and I didn't get it. I am disappointed but encouraged...why...well because of why I didn't get the job.

I interviewed with the President (yes, it was THAT kinda position) and the interview went very well..we had common interests and talked about family, the position of the company, the economy...just a mirage of things. I sent a thank you letter and he was cordial and appreciative. Then I found out a few days later that I didn't get the position. HR called me later that day and said that the President wanted to talk to me about his selection. Frankly, I didn't want to talk to him. I just wanted to go home. I didn't really need to hear the "you were a good candidate but didn't fit what we were looking for speech". So I blew off the call from HR and didn't call him to set up a meeting (I know that wasn't right...but hey that's what happened).

But then 15 minutes before I was going to leave, the President walks down to my desk and and tells me to "be sure"to stop by his office before I leave. GREAT..just great. So I put on my coat, grab my bags and put my sunglasses on my head and prepare to trounce down to his office with an attitude. My co-workers (who I told what happen) are thankfully God fearing and wise. They took off my coat, took my bags, put my sunglasses in my purse, got my lipstick out and told me to put some on and go to his office like I had some sense. I hate them :-). So, I did...long story short he did give me the "speech"..but he went on to say that to put me in that job would be a complete waste of resources and as a matter of fact he said he talked to my boss a few days ago to blast him as to why I was doing the job I was doing instead of something else. In my head I thought-WOW...out loud, I said...oh. I was speechless.

He told me to be patient (he doesn't know that I don't have any extra patience to spare) but that he saw that I could be leading a couple of key projects and assignments. He has only been on board at the company a few weeks, but he is taking note and manuevering people to strategic positions based on their skill set and potential-not necessarily based on only what they think they can do. Could this be all smoke and mirrors and an evil plot to sweet talk me to make sure that in my bitterness I don't overthrow the company?? I suppose...but I doubt it. Its not something he HAD to do. He could just fire me. He chose to take the time to talk to me. He could have e-mailed me, texted, sent me a letter...but I had value in his sight and he felt obiliged to move his calendar for a simple conversation. The man sowed honor, so now he his due honor. There was a BIG God-lesson there for me. Somehow knowing the logic behind it (the lesson and his strategy), it made the tough pill easier to swallow. Ok, it still sucked...but you get my point.

I even sent the lady who got the job a nice congratulatory gift and handwritten card on my best stationery (aren't I a sweetie...?) Yeah whatever, I didn't want to...might as well tell the truth-but I had to. I needed to bless her in order to settle what happened inside of me and move on. So, I didn't get the job...that hurt-but I am on first name basis and on the radar of the President of the company. Unlike most here, I got to "present" myself and show him my value add to this company. It was a God given opportunity that seemingly got me nothing...but actually got me everything. So, hey at 4:00, when I walk past that person's office who got the job who is still working her tail off and I'm going home to my family...I smile and say God you are wise and I trust you and I moonwalk to the elevator and go HOME.