tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-43381871708915818.post1806137556494322167..comments2023-10-07T09:18:57.902-04:00Comments on Welcome toThe Superfamily 13: Lessons on Stepparenting from my "Step-Pastor"C.D. Jamersonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11410771044686266051noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-43381871708915818.post-47925376881255090852010-02-20T00:04:20.190-05:002010-02-20T00:04:20.190-05:00This is an absolutely terrific article. I laughed...This is an absolutely terrific article. I laughed at the "step-pastor" reference. It's so fitting of the situation and made a great springboard for the rest of the discussion. What was most intriguing to me was your last statement:<br /><br /><i>Teach the children to respect their outside parents, but remind them that those people and their way of thinking, living, acting, responding or being has no place of authority in your home.</i><br /><br />Without question, the former spouses have no authority in the new family constellation. However, they should still have parental input into how their children are reared. After all, former spouses have terminated their marital bond, not their parental bond. In fact, they are not "outside parents", but non-custodial parents and there is a difference. Referring to them as "outside parents" sets up an adversarial dynamic of "us vs. them". Children, feeling love and loyalty to that "outside parent", will act out in demonstration that "blood is thicker than water". <br /><br />The process of communication, negotiation, and compromise will stretch and strengthen all involved. Without doubt, the "wisdom of Solomon" is required so the children are best served in BOTH homes. <br /><br />Selah...Joyce Irvin Harrishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17332097444556584502noreply@blogger.com